If a significant other suggests a suicide pact -- this is not a healthy relationship

A codependent relationship is not a healthy one. I have always felt like you should not try and find your “other half.”

If you’re a half person and you find another half person, this does not equal a whole. It equals two half people. Instead, you need to be a complete person and find another person who is a complete person. If you need another person to make you “whole” instead of being independent by yourself, you will rely too heavily on that other person.

 I don’t believe in saying, “I can’t live without you.” Instead, the mentality should be, “I choose not to live without you.”

And if this isn’t a codependent relationship – then I don’t know what is. On Monday, an apparent suicide pact between a boyfriend and girlfriend led to a woman's overdose death under an Oakland Township bridge, though the man with her survived, according to Oakland County Sheriff’s deputies.

 The man did not take enough drugs to kill him.

Trust me – if your significant other comes up with the idea to have a suicide pact – this is a big flashing-lights warning sign. Do not go through with it! No matter what Romeo and Juliet may have led people to believe – suicide pacts are NOT romantic!

If your significant other wants to make a suicide pact with you, call a hospital or a suicide hotline or even police.

When someone is considering suicide, some of the tell tale signs are: Always thinking or talking about death, deep sadness, loss of interest, trouble sleeping, losing interest in things once cared about, making comments about feeling hopeless or worthless, putting affairs in order, saying things like “it would be better if I wasn’t here,” unexpected switch from being very sad to being very calm or appearing to be happy and visiting people to say goodbye.

Many times, people who are contemplating suicide feel like no one would miss them (which isn’t true, by the way. This is the clinical depression talking). They feel like the world would be a better place without them in it (also not true).

But this feeling doesn’t fit in to trying to get someone else to commit suicide. This is something else entirely. If you think the world would be better without you – why would you want the woman or man you supposedly love to leave the world with you.

Don’t think, “Oh, he or she loves me.” No, this is not true. It’s the exact opposite.

 Love means wanting, more than anything, for the other person to be happy, even if you yourself isn’t happy. It’s trying to help someone out of their depression – helping them in any way you can. And when you’re in love, you think the world is a better place with the other person in it. You would never, in a million years, suggest that the other person take themselves out of the world. Giving the idea of suicide pact is just the opposite of love. It’s wanting the other person to share in your depression. It’s not wanting to be alone in your misery but instead, wanting to share it with someone else.

If you are in a relationship and someone gives this idea, you need to report it. And once that person is in a secure place, preferably a hospital, then get out of the relationship. You need to try to get that person out of the situation, but, at the same time, you do not need to be in this situation. I know you probably feel bad for the other person’s suicidal thoughts, but in this situation, it really is okay to think about yourself. This person is not only dangerous to him or herself self but also a danger to you.

Read original articles: Signs of suicidal thoughts
Suicide pact leads to woman dying under Oakland Township bridge

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